Weary Soul

Been stressed and feeling the weight of the world on my shoulders. Working in the customer service industry in south Mississippi is soul crushing. I am just a machine, not a person with feelings and thoughts, there to be spoken to dismissively and to say nothing while I make a pizza. Fortunately my sweet boss and (most of) my coworkers are easy enough to get along with.

Been in a bad mental state. Playing with thoughts of self-harm so I could at least make myself feel something. Being a liberal in a conservative household is tiring as well. My grandparents, while I love them dearly, can be so hard to live with.

My soul is sick and so is my mind.

I'm planning to spend Mardi Gras with my friend in New Orleans, and I sincerely hope it brings me the healing I hope it does.

Making a trip to Starkville, MS in March to Mississippi State University to interview with a professor I hope to get my master's under. Hopefully I can get into the grad program for next spring.

I'm just so tired, y'all. Just existing is hard.

--Merry




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